Well, at least he was honest...

Report: Man declares he's on crack, punches stepdad

Jeremy Brooks Dolan


MARY ESTHER - A local man faces a felony battery charge after he allegedly punched his stepfather and pushed him to the ground.

On Oct. 20 the Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office investigated a battery complaint at a Cascabellas residence that occurred between a man and his stepfather.

The victim and several witnesses told a deputy the stepson began "ranting and yelling about different things," according to the arrest report. Then, he told his stepfather he was on crack and began punching him and pushed him. The stepfather fell to the ground.

The stepfather was bruised and bleeding.

Witnesses said the man, 32-year-old Jeremy Brooks Dolan of Mary Esther, acted like "he was on something," the deputy wrote.

Dolan had received stitches on the back of his hand several days before. At the time of his arrest he was bleeding from the stitched area.

He was charged with battery with one prior conviction or subsequent offense. His court date is Dec. 4.

'murica

"Starting just after midnight on Oct. 29, the fellow called 9-1-1 and claimed he was having a dispute with his landlord and wanted to know what his rights were as a tenant. When deputies didn't arrive at his residence in the time he thought was appropriate, he called back and cussed out the dispatcher. Then he hung up.

A deputy went to his residence and discovered he was "highly intoxicated," the deputy wrote in the arrest report. His speech was slurred and he smelled strongly of alcohol. The deputy explained the Sheriff's Office lacked jurisdiction in a landlord-tenant dispute and he should stop abusing the 9-1-1 system, as it's for emergencies only.

The man defied this order and called 9-1-1 again, refusing to cooperate with the dispatcher but letting it be known he was recording the call. The deputy went back to his place and warned him again not to call 9-1-1. He provided the man with the office's non-emergency number.

At around 3:30 a.m. the man called 9-1-1 again and asked to speak to a lieutentant or sergeant about a domestic incident. When asked where he was, the man said he was in "Destin," then "America." When asked where he was in Destin, the man replied, "I said America not Destin."

For a third time the deputy went to his residence. He determined there was no domestic disturbance emergency and placed the man under arrest. He had to be dragged to the deputy's cruiser."

Well at least he can't be charged with providing false information to the police, the man was indeed in America.

Sources:
1. http://www.nwfdailynews.com/local-news/crime/police-blotters/man-says-he-s-in-america-not-destin-1.40713
2. http://www.funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/3843461/Makes+Me+Proud/

Don't drink the water!

"CRESTVIEW - For reasons that were not explained in a Crestview Police Department arrest report, a woman threw water, yelled at customers and got into a verbal brawl with Waffle House employees.

On Oct. 13 the woman was at the Waffle House on West James Lee Boulevard when she threw her glass of water over her shoulder, getting water on three customers behind her. 

She then became involved in an argument with employees, and tangled with another customer. That argument almost escalated into a physical battle.

The woman was witnessed using profanity and yelling at customers and employees.

She was charged with misdemeanor disorderly conduct. Her court date is Nov. 6."

     Who in their right mind just throws a glass of water over their shoulder at a restaurant? Maybe she thought she was from Asgard and wanted to pull a reverse Thor?

"This water is awful!" *swish*









1. http://www.nwfdailynews.com/local-news/crime/police-blotters/woman-stirs-up-a-ruckus-at-waffle-house-1.31783

Children will climb

     A Fort Walton Beach woman was charged with felony child neglect without great harm after her 5-year-old child was found nude on the roof of the residence.
Caroline Sue Humphrey, who is 44, was intoxicated and unaware that her child was on the roof, according to her Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office arrest report.
A witness notified her and retrieved the child off the roof with a ladder.
While the deputy was interviewing witnesses and Humphrey, he noted that she allowed her child to climb onto a truck and stand in the window of the vehicle, hanging onto the side.
When the deputy told Humphrey to get her child off the vehicle, she replied, "Children will climb."


     Wow is all I have to say about this one. Yeah children will climb, but stripped down naked and up on the roof? That is way above and beyond normal. And then while the cop is there about the kid being on the roof, he climbs in a truck and stands in it's window? I think we may have a canidate for mother of the year right here.

Source:
Northwest Florida Daily News
http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:1rSBxreE0CIJ:www.nwfdailynews.com/articles/child-52127-humphrey-roof.html+&cd=2&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us